Manifest This, Motherfucker

Some people say you can manifest your dreams by writing them down.
Vision boards. Affirmations. Journals full of gold light and future selves.

You know what I did?

I brought a journal to bed this week.
Grief journal. Dream journal. Same notebook. Dual purpose.
I was ready. Pen in hand. Soul open.

You know what I got?

Silence.
No dreams.
No grief.
Not even a whimper from my subconscious.

Apparently even my unconscious has oppositional defiant disorder.

Which got me thinking—
If trying to write something down means it never happens...
Can I reverse manifest?

Like—can I just intend to write down how I finally paid off my student loans,
and maybe that energy alone will wipe the debt?

Can I skip journaling about the perfect house
and just casually stop checking Zillow
until a distant relative gifts me a mid-century modern palace with natural light and an Eames lounger?

Can I refuse to dress myself altogether and be discovered as a fashion icon
because chaos is the new couture?

What else?

Should I stop making to-do lists and suddenly become hyper-productive?
Should I leave my inbox unread until the universe answers for me?
Should I stop caring entirely and finally be rewarded with peace, clarity, and a publishing deal?

The math doesn’t math.
The rules don’t rule.
And maybe the only system that works anymore is not giving a fuck in the most intentional way possible.

Let the girlies manifest on TikTok.
Let the hustle bros manifest passive income streams.
Let the spreadsheets manifest six-figure brands.

Me?

I’m gonna keep almost writing things down,
almost showing up to the ritual,
and watching the void flinch first.